Abu Dhabi (United Arab Emirates) - An immersive experience

ABU DHABI (United Arab Emirates)

25 August 2019

I’ve been living the ‘defacto’ bachelor life for the past six weeks of my existence. Interestingly this is notable in the fact that it’s the first, and probably last occasion in my life when this will ever happen. I’ve never had the opportunity to live alone, there’s simply not been a time in my life, outside of travel, where I’ve walked into my own place and had free reign. But the question is, is there any sort of importance to be placed on being a bachelor for a period of time? Is it a rite of passage that somehow allows one to successfully formulate and identify themselves by their own frames of reference without interference. Is there growth, introspection and a special place for Bikram Yoga in this space of isolation?

F***it, for me it never  really happened and I’ll never know what a 'Bachelor's Life' really means. All I knew for right now was that Inga & Aiden were in Latvia and that my evenings were occupied by uninterrupted Ashes viewings, so the timing of their departure, whilst not emotionally comforting was impeccable regarding my desire to watch 6hrs of cricket a night without family commercials.

Missing the both of them however was not all that entertaining.

As the weeks trawled by and my list of discoveries on the clandestine Melbourne bar list that I put together somehow dwindled to a stall,  I clawed myself onto Etihad Flight EY462 from Melbourne to Abu Dhabi via several champagnes in the Etihad Business Class lounge. I had to make the most of what little time I did have left.

Etihad Business Lounge - Melbourne Tullamarine Airport - Australia

 

Months earlier, when I’d purchased the my flights on Skyscanner I recognised that there was an ‘extended’ 22hr wait in Abu Dhabi between  continental flights. For some, this type of extended layover is always a nuisance, for me, its always an opportunity in waiting!

Arriving in Abu Dhabi at 06:05 on a hazy morning with the beams of an Arabian sun hitting the tarmac adding an orangey hue to everything it adorned, I noticed that the temperature was pushing 35 degrees already. This could mean just one thing for me, Yas Waterpark was going to be the prime destination during this stop.

0605 - Abu Dhabu Al Maktoum International Airport - United Arab Emirates

Booking myself a room at the Premier Inn at the airport for the paltry sum of 250 dirhams for the whole day, I had effectively acquired a room to act as just a storage and shower facility. I knew in myself that the bed would go undisturbed if my plans to remain outside came to full fruition.

Making it to Yas Waterpark by 10am, the sun was already high in the sky, punishing, reinforcing its dominance, showing that it was the true boss of the U.A.E.

That big ball of fury has a presence in this part of the world, like an omnipresent heat force that you find yourself wading through between  over efficiently air conditioned buildings. Somehow at Yas Waterpark, the potential escape within the cool pools, rides and slides was always punctuated by the rapid absorption of water from your body and the perils of judging how far you were capable of walking on burning concrete paths.

For 250 dirhams Yas Waterworld in my estimation 'OK to good', not brilliant, and perhaps not the dynamic excitement machine that was advertised.

After a few hours I’d taken my fill of urine filled pools, 13 yr old kids acting like dumb asses and the pirate and faery princess dressed welcoming committee at the entrance. How they were tied into to the whole Yas Waterworld melange I’ll never quite figure out and dedicating my mental time to solving that task I knew was going to be about as futile as understanding the rationale behind a Trump tweet.

Ferrari World - Abu Dhabi - United Arab Emirates

Ferrari World - Abu Dhabi - United Arab Emirates

 

 

My next stop however, at what I had assumed would be the underwhelming and highly overpriced Ferrari World, actually turned out to be a little bit of a ‘not-so-hidden’ gem. After having already paid 250dh at Yas Waterpark only an additional payment of 130dh was required for Ferrari World.

Now on first inspection the premises felt like a vacant, vacuous dedication that the manufacturer Ferrari conjured up boast of its eternal relevance. In this sense there should be no misconception, this theme park is exactly that. What makes up for their indulgence and consumer strategy are the rides, of which there are only really four, three of which were functioning when I attended.

Formula Rosso -  Ferrari World - Abu Dhabi - United Arab Emirates

The sign says it all - Formula Rosso -  Ferrari World - Abu Dhabi - United Arab Emirates

Let me say this;

The Formula Rossa is mindblowing.

I’m no roller-coaster aficionado but still, I've been on quite a few in my life. So when I sat in the front seat of what’s proclaimed to be the World’s Fastest Roller Coaster I wasn’t anticipating anymore than then pedestrian style of ride that most fun parks have.

But ...holy sh*t!!!

That coaster train accelerates to its top speed of 240kph in the first 4.9 seconds of the rid!. Your teeth feel as though they’ve hit the back of your throat and the only thing holding your brains in place is the seat head rest behind you. That initial acceleration, especially when sitting in the front seat, literally takes your breath away. As you explode out of the gates you quickly realise that the goggles they provide you are not just a 'fun fact object' that they thought would be a kitsch little accompaniment - you need those bad boys to protect your eyeballs from hitting any stray piece of whatever travelling at 240kph.

There’s only been a few times in my life when I’d almost involuntarily let out a scream of an expletive, with no conscious thought. The first that comes time mind was the scream that accompanied my plummet from the roof of the Moses Mabhida stadium in Durban. On this occasion the ‘Holy Sh*t’ that I let fly came from the g-force and acceleration experienced in those initial take off seconds, leaving you breathless, and it’s only momentarily that somewhere in that initial whirl of adrenalin that you realise the ride flings you 52mtrs straight up at the end of the acceleration ramp! It’s a wild ride, and one that I happily took on another 6-7 times during the course of the hours I stayed there.

I found that the hours at Ferrari World passed easily. Needless to say, the lack of any queues at all made the experience a pleasure. It seems, from the infrastructure in place, that once upon a time there were ambitions for consistently large crowds. I’d say however that form my two experiences there (I also went with Inga & Aiden on the return journey), waits for all rides was no more than 5 mins, at worst.

Getting back to the hotel at around 7pm, I took the opportunity to shower, change and head through customs early, well in advance of my 02:05am flight to Amsterdam. Not that I didn’t make the most of my time, all 3hrs were spent in the Al Raheem lounge with a credible buffet and GnT’s on call. Say what you will, but airport lounges do offer both comfort and requisite refreshments that make waiting for a flight more than tolerable, even enjoyable in many ways.

Some 6.5hrs out of Abu Dhabi and I was touching down at Amsterdam Schipol airport at 06:50 local time.

There was only a short stop here and a minor hassle getting into the Schengen terminal from the Non-Schengen area. Unexpectedly the line and wait time was in the 40 min vicinity and reminded me of the unnecessarily tedious process that would always accompany a transfer through Warsaw.

Still, I made the flight to Lisbon on time. Placing me one step closer to being reunited with my family in Madrid.